Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Library Fines

Dear MrM and MrsM,

I am writing to inform you that MissM has some books out on loan which are long overdue. Repeated reminders have failed to effect their return.

If the books are not returned to the Library we will have to make a replacement charge on the end of term bill. I feel you would like to know of this matter, and hopefully can expedite the return of the books concerned. We are delighted that the pupils are making use of the Library, but wish to underline the fact that other pupils would also like access to these resources.

The books are:

Philosophy: the classics by Nigel Warburton
Oresteia by Aeschylus
Greek religion and society by P.E. Easterling
An introduction to Homer by W.A. Camps
Lysistrata; Acharnians; Clouds by Aristophanes
Iliad by Homer

Thank you for your co-operation.

Yours sincerely

The School Librarian

*****

MrM and MrsM
were very impressed
when they read this letter
and agreed that it should be placed
in the family archives.

"That's my girl!" said MrM
(former classicist)

The errant MissM has promised
to return the books
expeditiously.

16 comments:

Eleanor said...

I'm loving the MissM posts, can they be an ongoing series please? MissM brightens my day!!

MrM said...

I feel obliged to point out how Aeschylus is supposed to have met his end: an eagle dropped a tortoise onto his bald head in the mistaken belief that it was a rock on which it could open up its prey. Never sure how accurate this is but it makes a good story and a counterpoint to the tragedies that he wrote.

And to think that all of this could have been prevented if he had worn a hat.

Thomas said...

It would have had to be a very hard hat!

Ali said...

When library books go overdue in our house, it is, more often than not, because they are lost in the pit that is Mark's bedroom. Just saying...

MrM said...

This is missing the point of course as if he had been wearing a hat the eagle would not have mistaken his head for a rock in the first place and avoided the need for a proto Barnes Wallis bouncing bomb effect.

Res ipsa loquitur. Or so I had hoped.

trashalou said...

But Mr M, had it been a light coloured hard hat then perhaps the eagle may have mistaken it anyway? Same story with a different ending. Oh how history turns on those small choices....

Rhiannon said...

My word that is an impressive list. When I first started uni we were given a similar list of books it was "recommended but not necessary" to read before beginning the course, and sitting in my living room I can see them all sitting very happily on a bookshelf. Just a shame they belong to my housemate not me :P

xxx

Julia said...

Did she have a favorite? And aren't former classicist husbands handy? (Always someone there to read inscriptions!)

peppermintpatcher said...

No Harry Potter in that library?

kristina said...

Once again feeling like a literary lightweight compared to Miss M! K x

The Coffee Lady said...

I don't want to burst your bubble but having been in that situation aged 18 this could equally mean that good intentions have gone awry, and said classics are at the bottom of the pile underneath other, less onerous, reading

Jackie said...

There's no chance it was Homer ...Simpson is there?
(Just to give us ordinary mortals hope)

readersguide said...

MissM might want to consider a career as a librarian. When you have access to the catalog you never need to pay a late fee . . .

monica said...

I think you should definitively frame that!!

BreadBox said...

I think that you should buy her copies of the books in question for her collection!

Poshyarns said...

I do hope that the fact they have been out so long is due to their perusal and not, as happens in this house, due to their being the right height to make a ramp for a train set.