Wednesday 17 December 2008

Just for the Record

A black cat sits and waits for me to walk past
and then slowly and deliberately walks in front of me.
I feel lucky today.

The chocolate tart at the Department Christmas Lunch
is the lightest of mousse
on top of a thin layer of Florentine.

A small granddaughter arrives for
the Children's Christmas Party.
She sparkles with sequins and smiles.

Why is this student is wearing a long black coat.
And black sunglasses.
And a white, furry hood with earflaps and bobbles?
Think Mafia meets Bugs Bunny.

There is a man outside my office doing T'ai Chi.
It is extraordinary how much he can do
balanced on one leg.

I receive an apology for a missed meeting
"I was queuing at the Libyan Embassy.
They had run out of stickers"

Colleagues email from Venice.
It is flooded and they need a boat
to take them to a restaurant.
Poor things.

What is the correct way to address a student
dressed as a Father Christmas Dog?

I am told that the office doorstop which I inherited
is a chunk of Volcanic Lava from Iceland.
It is, apparently, 'very mobile'.

The December page of the Student Naked Calendar
is slightly too fresh for the Reception
and is covered with strategic Post-It notes.

MrM wins £50 in the Premium Bonds.
He generously agrees to go 'halfy/halfy' with me...
(on the basis that if I win £1 million he wants a share)

Somehow I have made it
to end of the first term
in my new job.
I am exhausted.


Christy said...

congratulations on making it through the first term!! That is a milestone that deserves celebration!

Anonymous said...

I note at number 11 that MrM does not require 'halfy/halfy' of your million pounds, just a share.

(thank goodness for post-it notes)

Ali said...

Hope you get a bit of a chance to re-charge over Christmas.

But your new department does seem like quite the place to be.

Unknown said...

I feel that photographic evidence of the aforementioned post-it notes is a must!

JuliaB said...

Congratulations!! Hope you have a good rest. I love your student stories and expect I will have a few more of my own by the end of next term!! xx

tess said...

wishing you a thoroughly relaxing Christmas break.

The Coffee Lady said...

I think my mother has the hat in No 4

kristina said...

I know how busy you've been, so I'm sure you'll be very happy for a bit of a rest. Although I agree with Ali that your department sounds pretty fab.

And just wanted to let you know how much I love these random observations posts!

K x

Anonymous said...

Have a good break, relax and enjoy Christmas with the family.

By the way, does that doorstop move when you are not looking?

silverpebble said...

Well done on surviving the first term. A well deserved break is in store.

I'm intrigued by the lava doorstop. Presumably it's mobile when molten - are you in the geology department? Or are there compulsive rock kleptomaniacs about?

Anonymous said...

Well, even exhausted your wit is sharp. Hilarious. Rest up, dear friend!! :)

Anonymous said...

I enjoy hearing all of your quirky anecdotes. They are all fascinating in their own ways. Like tiny short stories.

Anonymous said...

1. have a well earned rest.
2. have a large glass of wine and a well earned rest.
3. after the rest you will find the strength to go and find the perfect gilet.

Gina said...

Hope you manage a well earned rest.